Tuesday, December 21, 2010

It's a mad, mad, mad world

Oh my word. You can't even imagine the madness I have endured this week. I don't even know where to begin. I'm aware today is only Tuesday but I feel like I've already seen enough people for it to be much further along into the week. I'm pretty sure I spoke to about 678 people at my register alone. It makes me really thirsty.

Let me just give a few examples of the madness that has occurred up in Bath and Body Works, more commonly known as BBW by those of us cool enough to work there, these last two days. Usually, the root cause of any madness is coupons. For some reason nobody understands how to use them, and they wait until I have 28 other people in my line behind them to ask how to use their pretty green magic piece of paper.
Why do they not just read the coupon, front and back you say? I have no clue. No clue.

Then, we have the ones who don't have the correct amount of items in order to get the current specials. Let me catch you up on those real fast, pay attention reader. 3 wick candles are 2 for $20, normally they are $19.50 a piece so it's pretty much buy on get one free. How many women can pass up a BOGO? Zero. How many women understand that 2 for $20 equals BOGO? Zero. Oh my gosh.  Okay, the next big steal is Buy 3 get 3. Buy any 3 items of our "Signature Collection" (body lotion, shower gel, body butter, body cream, hand cream, bubble bath, splash) get any 3 free. Mix and match... did you get all that? Reread if necessary because the illustration I'm about to give contains this info.

So I'm ringing people up like crazy, this lady sets her bag of goodies on the counter. She has one candle, and 3 bottles of lotion.
Me: "Did anyone tell you these candles are 2 for $20? or $19.50 a piece? you might as well grab another one."
Crazy Lady: "No thank you, I don't need another candle"
Me: "Are you sure?? It's buy one, get one free"
Crazy Lady: "I said I don't need another one"
Me:" Alllllrighty... I see you have three body lotions, you can get 3 more of anything in the collection for free"
Crazy Lady: "I get tired of you people trying to force everyone to buy more stuff. If I needed more of anything, I would have gotten it"
Me: "Please disappear before I kill you". No, I really said "Okay *big smile*"

Four minutes later, I see Crazy Lady in line again. Heaven help me. She is in Kelley's line, who happens to be one of the managers, and had just taken over the register to let another girl take a break.
Kelley: "Hi, what can I do for you?"
Crazy Lady: "I want all of this stuff voided because I just found out I only got half of what I could have, but nobody told me."
Me: "Come a little closer, lady, so I can hit you." Jk... I only thought that.
Kelley: " Sure! It will only take a second to take care of this and then I will go with you and show you exactly what you need!"
Crazy Lady: *glaring at me* "This young lady rang me up."
Me:"Yep. I did... Kelley, can I go on break?????"

Now that is just a taste of what goes down in BBW amidst the holiday madness. Despite the chaos, I like it there. I find people so amusing. Today I had this guy ask me "What does Warm Vanilla Sugar smell like?"
Umm.... Warm Vanilla Sugar. Duh... That's why it's named "Warm Vanilla Sugar". I didn't say that aloud, however. I made him smell it. And he said "mmmm, vanilla-y" Yeah, go figure.

Have I talked too much about my job today? Well too bad. It's my blog.

Christmas is Saturday!!! Yayyyyyy!!!


  1. Ahhh The joys of retail. I rememebr it well. I worked gift wrap one Chritmas. I got transferred after about a day. Still can't figure out why...
    Hey but this gives you a perfect reason to tell someone that because of matthew 5:22 you can't talk to them anymore. (I hope you went to that link on my blog or else you won't understand that.)

  2. I don't even know why i'm commenting on this I didn't even read a quarter of it,I guess it's just somthing to do.I don't like reading I like writting better.Well thats all.

    Mary CHRISTmas hahahaha...sorry

  3. Was there to many big words for you? ha ha lol jk